Receiving anything 'there' is as symbolic of turning the tables as anything you might do. It is at once terrifying to them and taboo/erotic. ALL cuckold men fantasize about their ass being played-with. Here is the first thing you need to know and accept. How nice would that be? These two activities are not 'ways of operating.' Rather, they are activities which have a strong impact on a man's psyche, an impact which has long-lasting residual effects. Think about it, doing away with that hurdle you most dread, push-back. Do these two things and I guarantee you will not get push-back. Here I will talk about two specific activities, which at first might seem extreme and difficult to bring about.

Dealing with push-back, the next levelĪbove we spoke about the underlying motivators that can be leveraged to diminish the likelihood of push-back. Later we will talk about the other two motivators: embarrassment/peer pressure, and calling his bluff.ģ. A little ground-work makes all the difference. Besides, I don't have to tell you how hard it is to simply drop out of nowhere and start barking orders. Do this and you will go a long way toward avoiding push-back. The point is to get him in that cuckold mind-set. It could be as simple as throwing a load of laundry in. Fire off a few racy text messages to him during the day, then follow them with a request for him to do something for you. If you want to exercise a bit of control and make him ripe for acquiescing to it, get him a little stimulated first, and it does not take much. Have you noticed how things he would never entertain most of the time are suddenly okay if he is feeling particularly randy? One day he is pissed off if he thinks you are flirting, and the next day he is encouraging you to do so. There are basically three motivating forces you will be leveraging. That means setting the stage for winning, stacking the deck in your favor is essential. As mentioned the more times you exercise your will and succeed, the easier it gets. The first thing I will tell you is closely connected to the strategy above. You HAVE to have strategies to deal with it. This is the thing that causes couples to stomp on the brakes or take a U-turn. Do you want to make this happen? Do this three times a day starting today and begin your journey.

Every time you exercise influence, it makes it easier the next time, for you and for him. Eventually this practice picks up momentum and takes on a life of its own. Or, when you notice the floor needs a quick pass of the vacuum but you are having a hard time getting motivated to do it and you casually get him to do it. You will know you are on your way when at some point you realize you need to pick something up at the store, but don't want to go, then you find yourself having him make the run instead. You WILL become more comfortable expressing your wishes, exercising influence (which becomes control), and you will soon find yourself asking more of him simply out of convenience. I have seen it time and time again with women I counsel. On the other hand, if you do this, several things will happen. If you cannot do it, then this dynamic is not for you. The point is for you to get comfortable exercising control. It could be as simple as taking the garbage out, running to the store for you, or some other low-level household chore. Make it a point to tell him to do something at least three times per day to start. It does not even have to be something sexual, but you have to get in the habit of exercising some influence. It is almost inconsequential what that something is. More to the point, you have to make him do something (or refrain from doing something). The only way to arrive at a given destination is to start moving in that direction. Here are some sure-fire ways to make it happen. Going through the motions, if you will, until an action does not feel so foreign. Have you heard the phrase 'Fake it until' you make it'? In this sense, it means doing some things that might not feel comfortable initially, or does not seem 'you' at first. That said, it ABSOLUTELY can be done, even for you. Have you and your husband entertained exploring the world of cuckolding but just can’t seem to get off the ground? Do you struggle with being assertive while he can't seem to give in to the relationship he claims to want and likely introduced in the first place? Do you stop and start repeatedly, swearing to abandon it, then finding yourself entertaining it all over again? The first thing you need to recognize is that changing the course of a relationship with respect to who is in charge is hard work.

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